I Sees Everything

I stood up from the edge of the stage and helped Sheila rise as well. I walked next to the microphone and motioned for Sheila to move in front of it. I looked her in the eye, the dead-black vacuum sockets present again. I feared nothing; her eyes were mine. She turned to the microphone and everyone in the warehouse came to attention. An unrecognizable voice emanated from her mouth, words flowing forth: "This is the time. Now is everything. You are all here. You will not be long. You are coming aware of your role and you will fulfill your tasks. These words have been spoken." Sheila stepped away from the microphone and bowed her head. She was old now, her hair gray, her body covered by a dark shroud, only long yellowed toenails protruding from beneath.

I stepped to the microphone and viewed myself on a giant LCD screen that now covered the back wall of the warehouse. I wore a multicolored robe, my hair and beard wild, bright red, smoke rings blowing from my nostrils. My eyes were pale green with soft pink where the whites typically were. "I know you, each of you devils in your own ways, bemoaning the plight of every other night, waiting for girls to leave the room, for the caviar to be served, worshiping the Great Whore in the Sky, a caricature of your memories before you forgot that I would find you, reunite you, align you with your purpose, bring you together before splitting you apart, scattering in the winds to the far reaches of the earth, each of you replacing those who have betrayed their station, each of you uniting from afar to create the world in my own image, an image cobbled together by each of you in body and action, not through ideas, not even emotions, but through the institutional structures guiding and ruling humanity, currently destroying the planet and everything worth loving."

I paused to look around the room, making eye contact with each person almost simultaneously, feeling their emotions, gauging their warmth, detecting the slightest fears, the leanest doubts. "Not all of you believe and some of you are frightened. That will pass as you come more fully into yourself." I knew the tabs worked at varying rates and that for some they didn't work at all. It was particularly for those who were too resistant to remember that I spoke to them, my words capable of penetrating the most resistant defenses. "I have my own roles to play and that is important to say for I am not the only one among you who will be playing a plethora of roles in this new world. Some of you will play just one role, have only a few tasks to accomplish, and then you will be able to rest in the fullness of yourself, watching not as spectators, but benefiting as beings from the changes taking place, benefiting in much the same way all of humanity will, from those like us who know to those who have never had a clue and may never in this lifetime. Still, even they will benefit."

I noticed a glass of water in my hand and I drank from it. When I was done the glass was gone. "Listen carefully as I speak to your souls instead of your minds, as I use words in orders you as persons are not familiar but nevertheless will serve you well when the time comes to perform your art in the world, to unsheath your masks, to display your glory, to dazzle the world with the gifts you have to give. These words that follow will change you now but only as a buzzing along your spine; later the buzzing will vibrate at such a high level that at first you will believe you will break apart but after that initial sensation and belief a calm will settle and you will be completely free to be yourself and change the world in your ways. I can see it even now and I am in awe of each of you. You think of me as your leader, but I am merely performing the role I had long ago agreed to play in the liberation game. I love this role; it's a fucking fun role to play. Only Sheila knows the role and, of course, she is playing a role now as well--her name is certainly not Sheila and while my name right now is Surprising it will not be for long. The memory of it will recede as quickly as your memories of your roles will recede when you become who you will become next."

I bowed my head in silence and then lifted it again, seeing on the giant screen that I now had no facial features whatsoever, no hair, nothing but a viscous, fleshy oval. Words and sounds cascaded from my being: "You're living in a fantasy world. This not your home. America is abstraction; justice pales in the light of ancient seasons; there's no hope in hope; nothing disgusting can be in existence without a belief in it; structures are delusional; movement is everpresent and nothing that resembles a noun has ever existed; don't give up on verbs, they are reliable: Act cut go jump hurl feel sting care forgive hunt erase gather weep gauge kill save nurture abandon bring offer give cast smile laugh regale divest illuminate eat drink sleep fall trust tangle quell roar delete vary create play tumble skate rake peel freeze heat drain collapse heave bundle juggle perform paint draw race find hide share wobble yell scream whisper ..." I continued reciting verbs for over an hour, each one of them a message for each person, a verb that would inform how to play each role in the world, how to accomplish tasks, how to become fully realized.

"Now it is time for us to go, to fill our roles. Please, hold hands with those next to you and close your eyes. Sheila grabbed hold of my hand and we closed our eyes. Not even a minute passed before I opened my eyes. Sheila and I were alone in the warehouse. I sighed and sat down on the stage. Sheila sat next to me and put her head on my shoulder. She said, quite softly, "It's hard to believe this is finally happening." I had no idea what she was talking about.